Dancing the Porcupine

It turns out that I have breast cancer. I was diagnosed in early July with invasive ductal carcinoma, which is the most common form of breast cancer (famous for its ability to metastasize, which is the scary part). At that point, I didn’t know what my treatment would be, but now I’ve had yet more biopsies and hence more information on which to base decisions. A second breast biopsy showed another site in my affected breast that had invasive cancer and a third site is suspected, which means I have to have a mastectomy. However, a node biopsy showed that it hasn’t spread to my lymph nodes, which is a very good thing. I won’t have to have chemotherapy. I will have surgery on September 22nd.

All this has caused me to rethink, retool, and renew my life. Many blessings have come from this. I can't say it has been a bad thing, although there is a downside of course, such as the threat of death and major disfiguring operations. Ah well, what it takes for some of us to wake up.

I've been reading The Four Fold Path, which has inspired me to pull out drum and rattle and practice shamanism again. The book was suggested by Holley, my new-found friend and old soul mate from many lives. It was so good to meet him again in this lifetime.

To get me through this episode of my life, the power animal who has come into my life is the porcupine. It turns out that they are dancers: “as the young get older, they are often seen standing upon their hind legs and rocking to and fro, waving their paws. This is a rhythmic exercise. When observed, it looks very much like a dance.”

I danced my porcupine in standing meditation yesterday:

Standing in my power
I dance the ecstatic dance of the porcupine
Renewal of awe
I climb to the top of the trees
I sway amidst the branches
Unafraid, grateful, and blissful

I stand girded by protection
Exposing my vulnerabilities
I swim the waters of emotion
Buoyed by hollow quills
I shuffle along the forest floor
Amused and curious