Recovering from an Overdose of Reality

The last post was perhaps a nadir for me. I try to be upbeat, but that was the day all my optimism crashed. Sometimes it's best not to do the research and examine the reality that I'm up against. I was overwhelmed with the thought of having to go through the next round of chemotherapy. I did a lot of EFT that day which helped me get a handle on it. I really didn’t want to dissolve into tears in the doctor’s office or while getting an infusion. I had my EFT group that evening and my group members tapped with me some more, which helped a lot. I was very calm by the time I had to go to my appointment.

After doing the research, I was also apprehensive about reducing the dose too much, as was Dr. V. He suggested reducing it by 25% which seemed like a good compromise to me. And he will order a blood draw at seven days after chemo to see if I’m getting neutropenic and put me on a preventative course of antibiotics if I am. I’ll also get a MUGA scan on the 12th to access if there has been any heart damage. If I get neutropenic again or if there has been any heart damage, we’ll probably switch to taxoltere for the next three rounds.

While I knew that chemo could hardly be smooth sailing, I had no idea that I could be brought down so low. I’m usually such and optimist, but it’s hard to be optimistic without my usual tools. I rely on a regimen of exercise to stay cheerful, about an hour a day. I adore riding my bicycle.
But I’m doing better now. EFT helped a lot to get my mood back again. I’ve been meditating as well and that helps. Perhaps I’ll take a walk to day. I have a hydro with Lori. It might make sense to walk over there and back. I’ll see how the day goes.

More hats at the top. I seem to be having some problems loading pictures lately, so there are still some to load. I'll post them as this program allows.